Finding My Way "In"

With fall in full swing, I have become adjusted to my new life as "mom of a preschooler." I love this life, as I get to crawl out of my shell (home) and become an active member of the adult world. My duties haven't changed much, but I get to add chauffeur and snack helper to my long list of jobs. While dropping off or picking up Synnove from school, I have the privilege of saying "hi" or striking up a short conversation with other moms. To most, I'm sure this small bit of interaction seems hardly mentionable...but to me, it's monumental.

Being from a small town, I know what it's like. You know...the security and sense of camaraderie you get to experience from living in a small community. It has it's cons, but the pros greatly outweigh them (depending on the kind of reputation you have!) However, in order to be "in" the community, you must actually know some of the community members. And even though Knappa/Svensen is only a short jaunt away from Warrenton, I know very few people here. Sure, I may know of them or have heard their names before, but that's about it.

In my younger years, while living in Warrenton, I hardly had to worry about finding people I knew. My dad had grown up there, my mom in Astoria. Each of their families had made a name for themselves, and many knew who they were. My grandfather actually did most of his growing up in Svensen and my great grandparents had strong ties here. However, their generation in gone, and my grandpa raised his family in Astoria and lives there still.

Anyway, where am I going with this? Well, I suppose I'm just trying to illustrate the fact that Knappa/Svensen just isn't my community...yet. I actually have to try to form connections and relationships with people I don't know. Now, if I were living in the city or in a bigger town, I wouldn't really have to try at all. How do I explain this? Hmm...in the city, you can be invisible, yet still have a bunch of great friends and acquaintances. In a small town, you cannot be invisible...and finding great friends is like sorority rush week. Don't get me wrong, the people here are wonderful and nice...however, they all have lived here for most of their lives and already have great friends...they don't really need new ones (ME!).

Fortunately, I actually do have a few ties here, and many of the folks out here know or have at least heard of one of my many relatives. I may strike up a conversation with a total stranger...they ask "so, you from here?" I say "sort of, I'm from Warrenton...my maiden name is....do you know so and so?" they say, "no, but I know so and so" I say "oh, I don't know them, but I've heard the name...do you know who so and so is?" they say, "oh yeah, they are my mom's uncle's cousin's cousin's girlfriend!" Overexaggeration? Hardly.

Back to what I was saying before...I'm enjoying this opportunity to form small connections with the people I see at Synnove's little school. It's just the beginning of my forever life here. Hopefully, I win a bid at AKS (Alpha Knappa Svensen)! I can't believe I just wrote that...I'm such a dweeb.